Half Homer Simpson, Half Bear

Rain and gloomy weather tend to bring out my inner bear-like tendencies. (Minus the fur and back-scratching against a tree.) The tendency to want to hibernate. The tendency to want to snack away at whatever's around me. (salt and vinegar chips with a jar of Nutella, anyone?) The tendency to move a bit slower than usual when I'm foraging for those snacks.

My inner-bear started to protrude it's true colors as I sloshed through the rain last night and made my way to a local restaurant to meet up with some former co-workers for dinner. While waiting in my car, watching every single raindrop do a dance on the windows of my car, I longed for the warmth of my pajamas and socks at home and all the fun snacks in the cupboards waiting to be discovered. Don't get me wrong. I love me some dinner and spending time with friends, but remember people, it was raining and rain = hibernating bear in my world. So truth be told, I was struggling to feel alert and peppy as I waited for just the right moment to finally go into the restaurant and enjoy an evening with old friends.

I waited at a table and chatted on my cell phone with my husband (so of course to look cool and pre-occupied) while I waited.

And waited.

And waited. (The cool act lasts about 10 minutes, FYI)

Finally, in a moment of Spazzoid, I asked my husband to check my little calendar/weekly planner/Type A scheduling book at home and confirm with me that tonight was the night of the long awaited dinner, right? RIGHT?!?!

Silence.

"Babe, I'm not joking. The dinner's tomorrow night. You might want to come home now."

FOR REALZ?!?! I half-laughed/half groaned/half wanted to smack my forehead in all Homer Simpson-style at the mistake I'd made. Upon hearing this, I dropped the cool act like a hot plate and hightailed home.

I know things happen for a reason, even the little things like having a scheduling mishap like I did. And this time around, I think this happened just because God wanted this little bear to laugh a little...even in the rain.

Lessons In Losing

I like having things in place and a place for all things. Also known as, a control freak over how well my file system is alphabetized, and which highlighter to use for which color-coded notebook, that's filed away in that bin, not that bin. So you could imagine my chagrin to discover that one of my precious camera lens caps had gone missing/ran away, done left a note to say "Peace out. I've moved on to greater and better things beyond being just being a mere cover lens stuffed away in a camera bag." My camera lens was now naked, people, and my system is now out of order! Somebody call a state of emergency!

I find that the funny thing about losing things, big or small, is that I tend to go through the same stages. The Panic McSpazzy phase where I do everything I can to try and find it, including throwing aside couch cushions, wiggling my fingers into that corner under the bookshelf that has yet to meet Mr. Dust Rag and Pledge...all this just to achieve feeling of peace that comes with knowing I have found the lens cap and all is well in my little world.

Then, if the Panic McSpazzy phase does not yield a recover of the lost item, then there's the blame game. It's because of this or that or him or her, that I lost that item, that relationship, that friendship, that spot in line, that last serving of honey walnut shrimp on the plate. (I blame it on my seafood-crazed sibling who takes advantage of the fact that I'm the more slow-moving eater at the dinnertable)

And finally, if the lost item isn't found, there's this weird grieving period. Wallowing in the feeling of straight loss.

The other night a friend of mine and I chatted about a mutual friend we had lost contact with and the hurt, sadness, and frustration that resulted because of this loss. And though it just sucks (for lack of a more mature word ), I like to think that as part of the whole "Im a big kid now" process, it's necessary to move into the stage of acceptance in order for Growth and Maturity to come around and hang out with you more often.

Oooooh. "Necessary to move into the stage of acceptance." That sounds so Dr. Phil, don't you think?

After a while, when Growth, Maturity, and I slowly become better friends, it's easier to let go, easier to accept loss, and easier to cherish with new appreciation what I still have despite that loss and what I've learned from it. 

And oh, lens cap, thank you for your coverage and protection to my treasured lens. I will miss you terribly and hope you have, indeed, moved on to greater things. 

Every Small Part of It

I'm not sure what age did it become cool to hang out with family vs. party on the weekend with a whole bunch of strangers, but I'm pretty sure this transition for me happened when I realized that family were the first humans on this earth to tolerate you even if your face was sporting caterpillar eyebrows like no one's business and weird colored turtlenecks with polka dots on them.

This weekend was no exception as my husband and I spent a Saturday lunchtime celebrating my favorite uncle's birthday at a local Chinese bistro. My tummy still smiles something fierce when the piping hot bowl of won ton soup is set down on the lazy-Susan by the waitress. I always have to remind my impatient tummy not to worry--- that yes, by the time that lazy-Susan spins around my way, there will be enough won tons left in that huge bowl for me.

What I enjoyed the most about this Saturday with family is how loud it got. Not from the sounds of the restaurant, but from the sound of the roaring laughter that erupted every few minutes as a reaction to a joke told my uncle, a story told by my cousin, a smirky comment from my husband. These sounds reminded to live. That I am alive. That those I love are alive and playing Wheel of Fortune with the lazy-Susan, too, on a random Saturday afternoon at a local Chinese bistro. 

And to remind me to enjoy every small part of it.

How I Know It's Friday

I stood in line at the bank wondering why that person against the wall was staring at me--only to realize that individual with a staring problem was a cardboard cutout of a person happily advertising the benefits of a savings account.

Sometimes, you just know it's Friday.

Have a fantabulous weekend!

Coffeehouse Chatter

BFFs! KIT forever!

These acronyms were generously scattered in multiple pen colors across old pages of yearbooks both in high school, junior high, as well as hastily scrawled in notes passed between friends during classes and lunch periods. The memory if it made me smile as I recall the days where actually writing a note to someone (and delivering it in PERSON...whaaaat??) versus typing out an email, was the everyday norm.

And maybe I'm getting old or somethng (no, I'm SOO not telling you how many white hairs I've counted on my head) but the meaning behind "best friends forever" or "keep in touch" has much more meaning and weight to it than it did when I was one of those students who'd hastily scrawl these acronyms across any note I passed or yearbook page I signed before the floodgates of summer break opened up.

The other night I gathered with a few old friends at a coffee shop we used to meet at regularly on Wednesdays. And there was something a little heart moving, a little nostalgic, and yes, a little emo for me as I observed everyone laughing and talking as we had done so many years before every Wednesday night, the only difference being that there were a few more extra chairs needed for the little babies that joined us. Time had passed and changed us, and yet nothing changed at all, if that makes any sense.  The chatter that kept battling the sound of coffee machines grinding were the same, the laughter were still the same. The familiar smell of coffee and of food from the Filipino restaraunt next door owned our noses for the next few hours. It was within these group of friends did I meet my future husband, so needless to say, these folks will always hold a special place in my heart. And though not everyone whom I've been fortunate enough to call friend was present there that evening, it still reminded me to never get tired of investing in friendships and sharing life with people. It made me thankful for friends who were there for the long haul and not just for a season. It reminded me that, truly, investing in people yielded so much more than investing in things.

A long time ago I used to want to try living in different places. To travel internationally and not be rooted to one place. And yes, I did get to travel. Yes, I left friends and family behind to try life somewhere else. But you know what? I'm thankful these experiences still led me back home...a home filled with lifelong friends, coffeehouse chatter, and the smell of Filipino food doing a happy dance in the air on a random Wednesday night.

Shoes and Flowers

Flowers? Colorful and cool.

Fashion? Uber fun.

Flowers meet fashion AND displayed in San Francisco?

YES, PLEASE!!!!!!

This weekend my husband and I celebrated 7 years of dating (yes, we still celebrate that!) and decided to check out the DeYoung Museum in San Francisco. It was their annual Bouquet to Arts Exhibit where floral designers take their love of all things floral and use it to interpret existing sculptures, paintings, & artifacts in the museum.

I love when artists of all mediums mix it up, bake it up, and shake it up to produce displays that make you go oooooooooooooh.

And that red shoe with the flowers displayed in it? Oh, how I love thee.

Have a wonderful Monday!

Cloud Walking

I llike to feel like my feet are walking on cushiony, fluffy white clouds. Everyday. Sunday-Saturday.

When I got my first pair of TOMS as a gift from my husband, I excitedly put them on, wiggled my toes in them, and realized my dream came true. I found my cushiony, fluffy, white clouds to walk on, in red, size 6.5.

I love my TOMS. And when I found out they made these bad boys like this, I became smitten. It's now possible to cloud-walk in wedges!! Who knew?

Here's to TOMS and walking on clouds...happy Wednesday!

Bad Cheese & A Subject's Heart

If something is really funny, I laugh. Loudly. And sometimes, my laugh gets my face all weird looking so much that I'm POSITIVE people around me can see my cavity fillings or at the very least, what I had for lunch stuck in my back teeth. It's in that moment that I suddenly get really self-conscious and try to unsuccessfully reel back all evidence of dork/nerd that's already escaped me.

This past weekend my husband and I set off to meet up with our good friends, Noli and Noemi for a photoshoot in their neighborhood. As I'd mentioned in this post, it's guaranteed that most of our time with them is going to be spent laughing becuase this couple has got a sense of humor like no other. And that dorky laugh of mine? Yeah, it does some serious overtime when we hang with these two.

However, I had a bit of a panic attack (internally, of course, so as not to blow my cool cover) on the way to the shoot location with our friends because I started wondering how was I going to capture serious photos of these two when all we do was laugh at, like EVERYTHING?! Ever try to smile on the outside and mask panic attack you're having on the inside? It's kinda like you ate bad cheese but wanna reassure everyone around you it tastes fine. No, really, it's fine, guys!

When our friends casually mentioned in the car that they don't take serious photos, my husband's response helped me get a grip.

"It's ok, guys, because it will allow her to capture who you guys realy are on camera."

That comment right there? It reminded me to quit stressin' because it'll be fine and it'll be fun. (And it was!!) More importantly, it was another reminder to me about what makes a great photo-- capturing the essence of a subject's heart and all that they are as a person on camera.

And the heart of this couple? It's all laughter and love. 

As it should be.

More to come....so stay tuned!

The Flower Diva

From the experience of my own wedding and being the guest at many other weddings, it’s safe to say that there is some serious muscle behind the hustle of planning the day, coordinating the details, and overall trying to keep everyone sane and happy. (i.e., keep the bride from crying anything but happy tears….you know how that goes!) I wanted to shed some much deserved light and attention to those behind the scenes who make the wedding day a memorable experience.

More to come, but here’s a sneak peak into the hard work that goes on behind the success of Nona Tai, owner of Floral Design Studio. She is a gifted floral designer and I was lucky enough to have her for my own wedding. Her work is going to be displayed at the San Francisco De Young Museum in a very cool exhibit called Bouquet to Art, so check it out!

Oh, and the puppy? That’s Nona’s own fur baby. Me loves anything doggy and there’s no way I was gonna let this one escape without her own little profile photo.

Mitch and Alia.

It was a Friday night at a local diner that I met Alia and Mitch to discuss their upcoming February wedding. They were finally going to have a church ceremony to celebrate their marriage (they’d had a smaller ceremony a few years ago) and wanted to have a photographer there to capture every moment of a celebration that has been long in the making. The clanking dishes and buzz of the restaurant patrons loomed over our conversation, but there was no mistaking the sounds of their happiness as they filled me in on the details of their wedding day and how they met.

It was during their high school days…the days of AOL chat rooms, prom seasons, and just the fun of being high school sweethearts. Alia met Mitch’s family before meeting Mitch and she laughed to remember the small details of their high school times together, down to the glasses she wore during that time. As she scrunched her face remembering those glasses Mitch just smiled and still declared “I like you with your glasses.”

She is more of the goofy laughter and he is the quiet smile that accompanies it. Together they are an example of what it’s like to celebrate love in everyday moments---raising their 3 babies together, him giving her his jacket when she’s cold during the photoshoot, and her making sure he eats vegetables every so often. (yummmm, broccoli!)

Mitch and Alia, thank you for giving me the opportunity to document this special day for you both. As an extra thank you, my dear hubby created a slide show of some of the special moments of your wedding day....hope you enjoy it!

May you both continue to celebrate love and life in the everyday moments the way that you already have.

With love, 
Heartbox Photography

The guys and gals were rockin' it like no other that day. I love me some alleyway shots!

Amia Bakery provided their beautiful wedding cake...

Their reception was held at Century House and we had lots of time to take some fun shots before the start of the reception....

I. LOVED. HER. HAIR. 'Nuff said.

Alia's awesome hairstyle and hairpiece were designed by the ever talented Kristina Eugenio of Salon Ethos.

One of my favorite shots of them....

Kony 2012

There are some things that should never, ever be kept silent. Please watch and pass on to everyone  you know so they are aware of this important effort to get Kony "famous".

Bunion Prevention and Leaving the Security Blanket Behind

Saturday went something like this:

"Do you want me to go with you?" my husband asked.

"Ehmm, er, no, but you know. If you want. No wait, I shouldn't be afraid and just go. Uggggh, why am I scared? No, I'll go. I can go by myself. Yeah. I can. I think.....um." Anyone who heard my answer would think I was hearing voices in my head and trying to answer them all at once.

This weekend, I was given the opportunity to be a 3rd shooter for a local photographer, Ananda at Bliss Fotography. It was exciting and at the same time nerve wracking as I prepared my camera gear, printed directions, and tried to figure out which pair of flats would work for this 7 hour shoot and wouldn't threaten bunions down the road.

I was so terrified I almost took my husband up on his offer to just sit in the car or hang out at the other vineyards and drink wine to pass the time while I went and helped shoot this wedding. But of course, I knew I had to face my fear and go in by myself. Like a grown-up. Or at the very least, a big kid without the security blanket. (Plus, the idea of having my poor husband totally hammered  from wine and bored at the end of the night didn't appeal too much to me either)

As with most things I get so worked up about.....everything turned out just fine. Ananda and her second shooter, Shereen were incredibly gracious as I followed them around just listening and watching how they interacted with the clients and handle various lighting situations. It was a great learning exprience and I am incredibly thankful.

A New Kind of Couch Potato

When my husband posted photo to my Facebook wall.  this it made me laugh. He found it on a site called Twenty Two Words.  The kicker though? When he said the blanket should be something that resembled a piece of bacon.

It's Friday....And I would love a baked potato right now.

My First Wedding and Freezing A Bit O' Happiness

There's a good chance I'm going to sound a bit babbly and a bit rambly in this post. I guess that's what happens when you're feeling happy, ecstatic, and incredibly blessed. You just tend to get a little cheesy. 

You know that feeling that you get when you see an 80 year old accomplish his lifelong dream of running a marathon? Or an artist dance their heart out on stage without fear or hesitation holding down any of their graceful moves? That feeling that makes you say to yourself, "Wow, that's so cool and I want to do that someday."

Well, what I've always wanted to do "someday" was to photograph a wedding and this past Saturday gave me a chance to do exactly that. Though I am still in the midst of culling and editing the final images, I wanted to share a sneak peak into a day that marked a turning point for Heartbox Photography and reminded me to never be afraid to take my camera and fly.

You just never know when you'll get a moment to freeze happiness for someone else.

Stay tuned... 

Happy Booger-Monster Day!

It’s Valentine’s Day and I am proudly sporting my nerdy red cardigan. Remember those days when your elementary school teachers required you to give EVERY kid in your class a Valentine’s Day card, but deep down inside, you didn’t want to give a card to the kid who stole your crayons during playtime or to the kid that was known as the booger-monster for all-too obvious reasons? I’m just sayin’. (And for the record, I was NOT someone’s booger monster!)

This past weekend, we got a chance to visit my husband’s grandmother, uncle, aunt, and cousins. We had not seen them in a while and I really enjoyed just sitting around listening in as well as participating in the familiar conversations and laughter that make a family, well, family.

Whether this day may be a happy, full-of-flowers-and-candy one for you, or a day where you’re still running from a present day bogger-monster, I hope you remember to celebrate love, in all its forms. Yes, with your significant other, but also the love you have for friends, family, and life itself.

Happy Booger-Monster Day!



Tucking Away the Chicken Wings

I was excited and of course, very nervous as we made our way up the Piedmont hills that housed the café shop in which I would be attending my first networking/meet up event with other photographers and industry peers. In the attempt to finally get connected with other like-minded photographers, I agreed to come to this event upon the kind invitation from another Bay Area photographer.


Now, I’m not extroverted by nature so to get over my shyness, (a.k.a. I’d rather be sitting in a corner in the back stuffing my face with whatever snacks were served), was a HUGE deal for me. My husband thankfully agreed to attend the event with me and as we made our way into the cute little photography studio/café already buzzing with chatter from other attendees, I couldn’t help but feel a tingle of excitement and anticipation as I made this small step towards connecting with others and ultimately making this photography business more real.

We found some seats in the back (in case my chicken wings came out and I wanted to run/kinda-fly out of there) and listened in as the speaker began his presentation. At the end of the night, I got a chance to meet the photographer who invited me (we had only corresponded via email up until this point) to this event as well as few other photographers. (And not once did my chicken feathers and wings flap out!)

All in all it was a great experience that taught me to tuck away my chicken wings and instead let courage and faith take flight. And yes, I am actually now looking forward to the next networking opportunity that comes up. (ooooh, I said it out loud!!)

Happy, happy Thursday!

Love and Short Arms

Watching the Superbowl/eating too many potato chips, and playing with my camera, while hanging out with cheering and screaming family members are what make weekends and time with the family the best. Especially the eating part. And yes, you guessed it, I (like everyone in America!) had to fight off every urge to stand up and start dancing like I was 8 years old again (side ponytail, colorful leggings and all) during the halftime show with the one and only Madonna. STRIKE A POSE, YA'LL! STRIKE A POSE!

My husband found this picture that made my Monday less mundane. Hope your week is starting off right and with a smile!

Sibling Rivalry And The Way to Solve It

I love remembering the days when sibling rivalry between my two sisters and me was the norm of everyday life. Everything from who snagged the last piece of chocolate (ME! Always me….), to who took the blame for broken lamp in the living room (sister number 1), or who got first dibs on the biggest bedroom in the house (sister number 3). I look at pictures like this and smile to think at how, as older sister, I could have solved many a conflict growing up with my two younger sisters had someone told me about this approach a long time ago:

If my husband and I ever get a brother or sister for our four-legged baby, Kona Bean, this is definitely the way I hope she handles conflict with her siblings.  =)

Hallmark moments and Pig Squeals

I love cards.

Store-bought cards, handmade cards, you name it. The way it's decorated, the colors, but most of all the hidden treasures of what's written inside. If I ever met the genius that started the whole idea of giving greeting cards, we'd be BFFs, homies for life, fist bump, for real.

My husband knows that I love cards so much that I'll read and re-read what's written inside at least 5 times, examine the colors of how the card looks, and if I'm really having a nerd-status day, I'll even smell the card simply for the cool new paper smell. And yes, you guessed it, I still get excited to dig through the mail and find the treasure of an un-opened card during holidays, birthdays and everything in between.

I had received a gift from my friend, Claire, as a thank you for doing a styled photoshoot of her as well as a coupleshoot of her and her husband, Jon a while back. And of course, in all my Hallmark-freak ways, I eagerly dug through the the fluffy and pink tissue paper to discover the hand-written cards she is known to give. I even pig-squealed a little as I ripped open the card.

"There is no such thing as failure, only early attempts at success."

It was written as a congratulations to the start of Heartbox Photography and of course, I read that line and the entire card about 10 times before proudly displaying the card in my office as an awesome reminder that someone took the time to tell me "You can do this."

*sigh* I love me some Hallmark moments.

Life is Too Short Not to Lick the Plate

A while back my husband and I were hanging out and having dinner with our good friends, Noli and Noemi. Noli started retelling the story of how his wife, Noemi, cooked a really awesome meal that tasted so good he not only savored every bite of it, but STRAIGHT UP LICKED THE PLATE, TOO. The four of us laughed until our faces hurt and it became a running joke from that day on.


(Sad to say, but I don’t remember the last time my husband licked the plate after I’ve made a meal. And this is just a guess, but it MIGHT have something to do with the fact that I microwave quesadillas and call it dinner. (I didn’t inherit my momma’s culinary skills….BUT I can program the heck out of a VCR. Told you I got mad skillz.)

In a few weeks, I’m going to have the opportunity to take my camera to a whole new level and shoot a wedding alongside my good friend and photographer, Sarah McGlaughlin. She’s a talented photojournalist (and actually gets it when I turn geek and start talking about lenses and apertures and stuff like that. Think pocket protectors but for camera folk) and though we’re friends I actually found myself stuttering “will, um, you, uhhhhhhhhh, consider, oh but you don’t have to be , but oh like, possibly be the second shooter for, this, ah, huh? A wedding, um, yeah for this wedding coming up?”

Though I sounded like a happy and stuttering nerd, she agreed and said she was excited to work on this project together. As we chatted about how the day was going to unfold, preparation details, more geek talk on lenses, etc. it dawned on me what a huge blessing this is. To be given a chance to challenge myself on a whole new level as an artist and photographer, to look every fear I’ve had in the eye and say “let’s do this”, is a HUGE deal for me. And it’s in these moments that I’m once again reminded that when someone gives you the gift of a wonderful opportunity to use your talents and shake what yo momma gave you, don’t hesitate to graciously accept it , be thankful, and enjoy it.

Every.

Tiny.

Part.

Of.

It.

Life is way too short to not lick the plate and enjoy the entire blessing given to you.
Quesadilla, anyone?